Obituary: Edna Cucumber, Former Exotic Dancer And Later Church Deacon, Dies At 102.

Edna Cucumber, former exotic dancer and later a church deacon, died at the age of 102 outside her home on Cherry Drive in North Wildwood. She was born on April 1, 1924, in Tuckahoe, New Jersey, to parents Gardener and Greenie.

Known for her ample bosom, Edna was the star attraction at the topless club “Funbags” on Pacific Avenue in the 1940’s.  It was rumored Dwight D Eisenhower celebrated his 58^th birthday at the club and Edna was said to have blown out the candles on his cake with a ping pong ball.

The trend in the 1950’s away from breasts into butt stuff soured Edna on exotic dancing. In 1954, she experienced a religious conversion and devoted her life to First Presbyterian Church in Wildwood. Father Wankin, the minister at First Presbyterian at the time, appreciated Edna’s ability to attract new parishioners but grew frustrated repeatedly reminding her to collect donations in the approved baskets, rather than in her cleavage.

Edna’s breasts, once the talk of the town, also tragically contributed to her demise.  As they sagged over the years, she tripped over her tits taking out the trash, bumped her head and died.  Services will be held at First Presbyterian on Friday.  Per her last wishes, the casket will be open to “allow the pervs to cop one last feel”.