A Candidate For Wildwood City Council Has Won Election Campaigning Naked. The State Of New Jersey Is Taking Over The Wildwood Government Again.

Rotundo Grimace has been elected to the Wildwood City Council despite campaigning completely naked, save for a single sock covering his genitals. His slogan, “Expose Everything,” and his pledge to root out corruption and runaway spending proved popular with voters. His message also resonated with the 28% of Wildwood residents employed in prostitution or accounting positions that require working in the nude.

The State of New Jersey has filed a pre-emption against Wildwood and plans to install state employees to govern instead. “The Declaration of Independence states we hold these truths to be self-evident. And what is self-evident is that government employees should wear fucking pants,” declared the Governor.

The state’s move has sparked backlash from residents, who have organized a naked protest against the takeover, insisting they have the right to be governed by their own choice. “We will converge in a sweaty, pulsating pile of human flesh to protest the Governor’s indecency. And there will be no socks—on feet or otherwise,” vowed Forrest Bush of North Wildwood.